She said I am fat!

I know I gained some weight and last time I checked my BMI was still normal, but a nutritionist at Mercury Drug told me earlier than I am now FAT!  Sacre bleu!

I mean, ok.  I look at the mirror and I see the problem areas.  I even admit that I need to lose weight.  Ideally I would like to be 130 to 135 lbs.  But for a complete stranger to tell me I am fat ... maybe I have to be more careful about what I eat now.  After all, I'm at that age where losing weight is very difficult to do.  Exercise alone doesn't do it, that's for sure.

I even know what the culprit is ... Coca-Cola.  I remember a time when I was able to stay away from the soda easily.  But with this summer heat it just seems like coke is so much more refreshing!  So, as soon as I got home I pushed aside the soda drank water ... and water ... and water.

I don't think I can lose 15 lbs that quickly, but I hope I do lose weight ... and undesirable bulges.

Dear Justin ...

Dear Justin,

I heard that you and Jessica Biel just didn't work out. I am sad for you, but, can't help but be happy for me, ha ha ha.   Since you are now single again that means that I can fantasize about you again, guilt-free!

I really wanted to watch your concert when you were here last but I hope you come back someday soon.

I really love your Love Sex Magic video with Ciara.  Talk about HOT!  And to think for most of the video you were just sitting, standing, lying there enjoying all that sexy.  Ciara was just smokin' in it!  She certainly looked like she was into you.  I know I am. 

Hmmm ... I think I want to see that video one more time ...

Sizzlin' hot!  I only wish that you had danced in the video.  I love watching you dance.

Getting over a writing hump

I enjoy writing, I really do.  But sometimes I look at the stuff I need to work on and my mind just refuses to work properly.  Words appear in my mental screen but none that I would want to use for whatever project I am working on.  Sometimes a week passes before I get my Eureka! moment.

That's seems to be the case now.  I received this "invitation to bid" on a writing project and I was asked to send a sample by writing copy for at least one section of the site to be revamped and for days I've been struggling with what to put down.  I must have revised what I wrote almost ten times and it wasn't until last night that I felt I was making some headway. I am now waiting for a response to some questions so that I could adjust my writing accordingly, if necessary.

And then there is my summer class work.  I've done the preliminary research but I have yet to type it up and start the actual public information campaign document.  I will get into that immediately after writing this blog.

I suppose the fact that I have been under the weather for a week now hasn't helped.  Now that I am on the mend, though, it seems my brain is starting to work again, too.  I hope my muse stays with me so that I can do a good job in fulfilling my writing obligations.

Dear John

Some friends and I were just discussing the movie Dear John that stars Channing Tatum (one of my uber-crushes!), star of Step Up and Amanda Seyfried, best known for her role in Mamma Mia!  We started discussing when was the last time we wrote a Dear John letter and I realized that in my life I have only ever written one, and this was when I was around 15 or 16 years old.  I found out that my boyfriend at the time who was supposedly in another province was actually in town and seeing someone else.  I cannot say that I was devastated about it (I think at that age I wasn't really too emotionally attached to him yet) but I was certainly angered by the news.  I recall that in the letter I said something like, "if you have the time and energy to see other girls besides me then I will release you so that you could have even more time and energy for them ..." or words to that effect.

Despite that "break up" he and I are good friends to this day.  It wasn't until many years later, actually, that he and I were able to fully discuss what happened in our relationship those many years ago.  In between, though, we had kept in touch and were friends.

Now, I'd like to write another Dear John letter, but this time it isn't a letter saying goodbye.  This Dear John letter is a declaration of love and affection.    Yeah, there is a romantic in me, hehehe.  Why am I writing it?  The truth?  I'm supposed to be working on a project bid and a paper for school and I have writer's block so I thought I'd write some fluff to get my creative juices flowing.  Tee hee

Itago na lang natin siya sa pangalang John. (Only 'cause that's how I started this piece ...)

---

Dear John,

What is it about you that has changed me so?  I think of you and I can't help but smile.  In a world of black, white, and gray, with you I see colors!  When I am with you everything seems to be brighter and sparkles.  You are never far from my thoughts.  I close my eyes and you are there.  My dreams are often filled with thoughts of you.  Memories of dinners together, walks, chats ... all the happy memories.
When I'm with you I can't help but smile all the time. Just the thought of you makes me smile.

When I'm with you I feel like no problem is too tough to solve.  You always tell me that you believe I can do anything I set my mind to.

When I'm with you I feel beautiful and sexy.  It is as if you are blind to my physical flaws.

When I'm with you I feel wanted and desired.  You look at me like I am the most beautiful woman in the world.

When I'm with you I feel loved.

Whenever I feel neglected (which, as you know, happens every now and then.  I'm needy that way, hehe.) I try to remember the reasons why we cannot be together in one form or another and sometimes, that works.  When it doesn't ... I just try to put it at the back of my mind and concentrate on work.  After all, the world won't stop spinning just because I'm feeling needy, fat, and ugly.

I wish we could be together but I've learned to accept the situation for what it is.  Who knows, maybe someday soon we will have our chance at happiness.  For now, we have this, and I will make the most of it and make sure you never forget that you are loved, too.

And so, I leave you with three words, eight letters ... I love you!

With all my heart,

Jane

When I get sick ...

I've been feeling poorly since Saturday afternoon but I thought it was just the heat.  I even went home early that day with the intention of sleeping as soon as I see my bed.  But after I took a shower I felt a little better, and went to sleep shortly after.

The following day (Sunday) I had some errands to run and since it was so hot I had a watermelon shake before going home.  When I did reach the house my tummy started spasming every few minutes.  I figured, it must be the watermelon shake on an empty stomach and so I ignored it.  Next thing I knew, had no appetite, I eat but I don't feel like I did and my mouth had a funny taste.  And again, I just ignored it.

Same thing happens the following day (Monday).  Again I ignore it.

Another day passes (Tuesday), still I ignore it.

Wednesday arrives and this time I was hurting enough to tell my mom about it and tell her I was feeling a tad feverish.  By 7pm I was already experiencing chills and I was having difficulty keeping my food down.  By the time I got home at around 11pm I was shaking and hot and dizzy.  I took a vitamin C capsule, a glass of water, and bundled up in a blanket and was immediately knocked out.

Morning comes (Thursday) and I can barely get out of bed.  My mom knocks on my door and gives me a glass of water and a couple of Transfer Factor capsules.  A few minutes later she is back with a cup of coffee and asked me how I felt.  By this time I felt much improved.  The fact that I was able to sit up was a sure indicator.  I was able to go down and join them for breakfast even though all I ate was 1/4 of an apple and even that I just threw up.  I just couldn't keep anything down.  I didn't think I would be well enough to go to work, but by afternoon my fever had already broken and after a quick shower I felt well enough to travel.  Mom says I must have a stomach flu or something.  It certainly feels like a flu.

It's Friday morning now.  My mom and dad have me popping analgesic and vitamin C and some Transfer Factor (morning and night) and so I feel well enough to being my old workaholic self.   After all, sick or not, I still have deadlines to meet.

I'll try not to overdo it.  Tomorrow (or I mean later) and the entire weekend are going to be hectic for me.

Summer school, here I come!

I am such a nerd!   Believe it or not I am really excited about summer school starting on Saturday.  Maybe it is a sign of maturity that I am excited about learning something new.  I can't deny that there is so much I still need to learn and so many things I still want to know.
I enrolled in 1 subject for the summer --- Managing Public Information Programs and Campaigns.  My classmates and I chose this subject because we thought it would be appropriate given the upcoming national elections.  We are hoping that whoever our professor is will bring us "on the field".  Perhaps we could go to the campaign headquarters of a candidate?  Or maybe we could go to a news agency or talk to reporters of news programs.  That would be cool, too.
Class will be from 8am to 5pm ... that is one looooong class!  I am hoping that the teacher can mix it up and make it interesting.  I am also hoping for decent meal breaks, hehehe.  An hour long lunch, perhaps?
Can't hardly wait for summer school to start! 

Weighing in

I weighed myself before all the Christmas feasts and again at the first week of March and I was shocked when I found out that I gained 20 lbs!   Noooooo!  The weight I put on really worried me.  I don't ever want to be overweight again.  Being overweight comes with so many problems.

And then things got hectic in school and I had so many papers to write.  The stress somehow made me eat less, and I made a special effort to limit my soda intake to 1 glass a day, I cut down on my rice and TRIED to cut down on my sweets.  I don't get 2 donuts with my coffee anymore.  I limit myself to one and I go for the healthier cinnamon apple filled instead of the sinful caramel apple pie.

Over the Holy Week I unintentionally dieted, too.  I was eating bread and butter for 2 of my meals on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday.  I say unintentional because I wasn't really dieting. The bread just happened to be that good. 

Today mom and I (and my niece, Tasha) went by Mercury Drug and I weighed myself again on the same scale.  Holy cow!  I lost 10 lbs!  Woohoo!  I must be doing something right.  I am going to start running again tomorrow.  Hopefully, I can go back to my ideal weight before the summer is over. I want to look good in a bikini again, even if I won't get a chance to get in one this summer. 

Dying for a breath of fresh air!

Did you ever wonder what I fart tasted like?  I never did, nor did I ever want to find out but to my dismay I found out today.  Kasuy and I met up at Krispy Kreme Cubao and someone at a nearby table released a "silent killer".  It stank so bad I was choking!  and what was worse was that it lingered for a long, loooong time.  We were already complaining about it and I even tried burying my nose in my cup of coffee but to no avail.  The stink penetrated through the caffeine smell, too!

We even sprayed alcohol in the air, it had no effect.  All we got was stinky air mixed with a whiff of sterile smell.  THAT's HOW BAD IT WAS.  I even sprayed directly in the direction of where the stink was coming from in hopes the person or people will get the message.

Flatulence is natural.  Everyone passes gas, right?  But the least we can do when we do pass such a stinker in an air conditioned room is to make some effort to dissipate it, right?  Or, if possible, hold it, go to the rest room or step outside and let loose there.  Have some consideration for the other people in the room who have to inhale such foul air.

I missed Wholly Trekday

So ... I wasn't able to make it to Wholly Trekday today. �Every year I make it a point to drop by, even for just an hour but yesterday I just couldn't muster up the energy. �The heat was one reason I decided to stay in, but mostly because I wasn't feeling too good. �I spent most of the afternoon asleep and then, come night time, I found out that Back To The Future was showing on the Cartoon Network at 9pm. �Needless to say, I stayed home to watch that instead.

Wholly Trekday is an annual get together of Philippine (Manila) based Star Trek fans and friends where we get together to eat, drink, chat, and watch Star Trek together. �For the last several years this has been held at Fandomcafe in Cubao, Quezon City.

I'm sure all my friends who attended had a blast!